Life, USA - English,

Should I let my child’s friends come to my wedding?

So you’ve got the dress, the venue, the photographer; your food’s sorted, you know what flowers you want, now it’s time to sweat the small stuff!

There’s so many little things that you can worry about when it comes to your wedding, and let’s face it, the  guest list can be the biggest nightmare there is. Who are you going to invite, what are the friend and family feuds, if you invite X should you then invite Y? Minefield! And what about if you have an older child either because you’re marrying late or from a previous relationship, you know full well s/he’ll want company. But it’s your day, right? So what are you going to do?

The short answer is: Let them invite a friend or two who can arrive after the meal. That way your child is a part of your special day but they wont be lonely in the evening. The why of this is a bit more complicated and there are two ways of approaching this subject.

Easy Ride

Whatever your own personal circumstances, there’s two things that always hold true: A, your child loves you, and B, children can be oh so very demanding. Your child brings you happiness, and if you would like that added to by way of minimal tantrums then let them have a friend with them. They’ll be lonely without someone there for them and you don’t want that stress surrounding your wedding. Kicking and screaming is a less than classy thing to happen on your big day. Besides, what’s one more for the buffet?

But it’s my day!

Yes it’s your wedding day, but don’t all those people who are there to support you have something to offer and don’t they deserve a little something back? You might be buying dinner for 60 people (who will no doubt all get you the same toaster, but there’s going to be receipts so don’t worry), but they’re there to celebrate with you, enjoy the good times and watch you make kissy faces at your beloved all day. Your child is one of these people, so give them something back! Has your child not helped you with the preparations, wrinkled their nose at your seating plan and helped you pick out ice cream flavours for dessert? And isn’t it better to have all your friends and family congratulate you on your cheerful well behaved child rather than otherwise? You know it’s true 😛 

There’s no right and wrong when it comes to a modern wedding, but the ultimate goal is for you to marry your partner, have a great day and live a long and happy life together. The wedding of your dreams should feature these key elements:

  • You and your partner
  • The ceremony
  • Lots of fun
  • No stress on the day

Anything else is a bonus. It doesn’t matter if the flowers aren’t right or the silverware doesn’t match, you have each other – that’s the point of a wedding!

And if you’re not 100% convinced on what I’ve said I would like to share some photos with you from a recent wedding. The bride’s daughter was 13, and had 3 friends arrive after the meal. I spent some time with them while they enjoyed the day and I have to say the whole thing was a riot! It gave me a chance to be silly with them (they forced ice cream on me so it might have been the e-numbers), and after the fact meant I could have more fun with the digital processing to create some more interesting looks. It was great fun, and I know her folks are really proud of how she was responsible on the day, never made a fuss or a scene and entered into the spirit of it all.